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  #1 (permalink)  
Old 10-10-2003, 10:47 PM
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axes wayy too many questions
 

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Arrow Chapter 2 of my storie: When Billy meets a girl

“Damn it’s lame out her tonight Pete, no ricer’s to be found.” says Billy glancing all around the street. “Where could they be?”
“I don’t know.” Says Peter dumbfounded.
Billy pulls over to an old man about 67 years old.
“Excuse me sir, where is everyone tonight? Isn’t there usually a big car show Fridays?” asks Billy.
“I don’t know sunny, but I did hear something about them canceling the town car show and starting something out at the Reynolds’s farm. Maybe you should try there.” Says the man giving a smile to Billy.
“Thank you sir.” Says Billy.
The two drive for about 25 minutes down a 2-lane highway until they see a sign that says ‘Reynolds Farm: Greatest Strawberries in the State. Turn left 3 Miles’
“That’s it.” Says Billy pointing to the sign.
The car turns onto an old one-way dirt road. Dust flowing in the air already makes it obvious that car shave been down this way. The car enters a dark patch of thick trees. Owls hoot and the howl of a far away wolf echoes through the night. Old rusted cars are barely visible with the help of a faint moonlight. A doe darts across the road and off into the distance. The darkness covers Peter and Billy for at least 5 minutes before coming across a patch of lanterns leading the way. The car bounces through the field where berries used to grow. The 39 Ford finds it’s way through the field to find itself in a line 10 car’s long. A man with a long curly mustache walks up to Billy. He recognized him as Jim Reynolds Leidrow, a retired Vietnam Vet who hangs around ‘Langenkows Sports Bar and Grill’.
“Hey man nice car, what are you here for.” Asks Jim.
“I don’t know, I heard there was a car show going on here from and old man in town. Is this the right place?” Asks Billy
“Yeah, sure is.” Says Jim looking over Billy’s car. He walks all the way around the car inspecting it. “Tell me about your car and stuff” says Jim.
“Well, Peter and I built it ourselves in his garage. It has about 560 HP and 6,000 feet of torque.” Says Billy
“Nice.” Says Jim in awe. “Go right up that way and turn left when you see a man with a glow stick around his arms, show his this pass.” Says Jim giving a yellow piece of paper to Pete. “You be careful kid”
“I will.” Says Billy with a huge grin on his face.
The car pulls up next to a 55 Bel-Air, Blown and set-for drag.
“What’s that got in it buddy?” asks a 19 year-old female sitting in the drivers side of the Bel-Air.
“565 HP with probably 6,500 feet of torque. Blown 375 SB Ford, the blower is 8-71. How about you?” says Billy giving the attractive young brunette a wink.
“527 HP with exactly 6,256 feet torque. The engine is a 350 Chevy with a 8-71 also.” Says the brunette with a faint smile adding “Wanna race?”
“Sure.”
The cars meet at the man with the glow sticks and show them both their passes. They pull up to a well-organized and finely paved drag strip. There is a small crowd and a man with a microphone and glasses. Billy also recognizes him as him high-school enemy, Andrew Stalkins. Billy pulls up the tree and lights up his tires, sending the crowd of about 50 people into a crazed tantrum. The Brunette responds with a flair of her own. The two reverse back to the line and Peter gets out, directing Billy to the line.
“Smoke this ***** eh’ Billy?” says Peter with a huge grin and then walks off to the bleachers.
The lights go into the pre-stage and Billy revs up his RPM’s to about 1,500 and as the light goes green he slams it into first. He rockets forward doing a wheelie but being caught by the wheelie bars. He pulls out far ahead of his opponent going into 2nd gear and 3rd gear. 4th gear he see’s the vixen out of the corner of his eye. Billy glances over and throws it into 5th and final gear pulling out ahead of his opponent. Billy crosses the finish and goes off into the post staging zone. He looks up at the monitor and it displays a time of 9.56 seconds and a speed of 169 MPH. A new record!!
Billy meets his opponent at the other end and shakes her hand.
“Nice Driving.” Says Billy looking the brunette in the eyes.
“You too. My name is Stephanie.” She says with a smile walking away.
“What was that all about Billy?” asks Peter looking at Stephanie walking toward her car.
“I think I’m in love Pete!” says Billy with a smile.


I hope you enjoy. It took me awhile.


HRK(Alex)

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Old 10-10-2003, 11:56 PM
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great part dude.. whats gonna happen next..
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Old 10-11-2003, 09:05 PM
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Don't you think the torque ratings are a little too high?
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Old 10-11-2003, 10:27 PM
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'Pete' alright, 'Peter' no way. I envisioned 'Pete' as being a gearhead/mentor, but 'Peter' as a weenie. For example, you could name the ricer driver 'Lance' and his 'tuner'/mentor 'Chandler' and we'd be able to envision a character just by their names.
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Old 10-12-2003, 07:30 AM
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Quote:
Billy revs up his RPM’s to about 1,500 and as the light goes green he slams it into first. He rockets forward doing a wheelie but being caught by the wheelie bars.
All of 1500 r's and slams it into first? I envision killing it right there on the line. Sounds like a ricer.

Man...I revved her to 1500 dude!!!! Almost blew it but she was screamin' for all she was worth. Almost made the whole motor torque sideways!!!! WooHoo!!!Fasten your seatbelts!!!
After revving up those 1500 r's I don't know if the car will take it anymore



I hate to tell you HRK but if you are gonna write you need to add a little bit of realism. 1500 rpm's is about 500-600 over idle.
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Old 10-12-2003, 01:16 PM
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Laissez les bons temps rouler
 

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I personally think it was pretty good. Very descriptive and detailed. Although I do agree with Kevin to a point. You have a great platform for a great story. But to make it even better and top notch you need to get the facts perfect. Like the TQ numbers, and the Rev numbers. But, those are easy fixes. Other than that, it was a great story. I can't wait to read the next chapter.

Chris


Where's Chapter 1, I can't find it.
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Old 10-12-2003, 04:31 PM
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Inexperienced Dude

The Babes will be shopping at the grocery store and easier to talk to than at the drags, kind of NOISY THERE. Then your what 15 dude? You never have anything to loose talking to a sweetie anytime you see one , just don't make a fool of your self. The guy was right about the revs coming of the line, don't blow your engine or anything. My red line is 5,500 on my balanced 377sbc and that is just to be safe and not BLOW UP The engine. What with the death wish, this street racing dream will get you killed kid. The torque numbers you had from that engine are unbelievably ridiculous. How about ending this fantasy life and tell us whats for sale in the local papers to make a project out of. Mow lawns, walk dogs, clean out gutters, take out trash clean basements or attics, paint porches or doors or plant flowers or trees and bushes for people to get MONEY to buy you're ride and SAVE EVERY DIME man. It will happen, it can be done. There is a a guy/16yr old, out here in Amherst Ohio that just finished his 57 Chevy. He bought the shell 2 years ago and has financed it with yard work and any job he could get by advertising his willingness to work at the grocery store bulletin board. Typed up and nice paper and took on ALL jobs. Good Luck. It will happen, you will make it happen, all things are possible in this Hobby, I have seen them happen.




Todd



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Old 10-12-2003, 07:22 PM
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Come on guys

Give the kid a break. He apparently has a gift for the pen. He just chooses to write about something he loves. Racing.

Keep up your writing kid. It may actually finance your rodding one day. Writing sure beats mowing lawns for numerous summers. Not that there is anything wrong with mowing, I've done my fair share. Just dont try to live out your stories in real life, that may get ya killed.

Chris
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Old 10-12-2003, 07:24 PM
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Your characters are too polite, unless this is Smalltown, USA. The storyline is as believable as F&F, I suppose. You need to start revealing the plot real soon.

It's got potential, but it's gettin' boring fast. Chapter three needs a police raid, a fire, a zombie with a chainsaw, or some kind of bone chiller. The fact that anyone 14 can write complete sentences anymore thrills me. Keep working on it Alex. Best sellers don't come easy unless you're Oprah.

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Old 10-12-2003, 08:00 PM
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Maybe you could make Billy's love interest a devout ricer chick. Maybe even make her turn out to be Pete's long lost daughter who's mother is a woman from his past racing days of travelling the circuits. She should be resentful of Pete for not being there for her all these years. In fact you could go another step and make her stepdad an old rival of Pete's from the racing days. Except her stepdad made it big time in the racing scene, but is a pompous big headed egomaniac that doesn't really treat her mother or herself right. That way you could really make it a showdown of the old timers battling vicariously through the kids. Yeah it's formulaic to a point, but you could easily show your flare for writing if you have a foundation first. The rest is just story telling, that's what it really is.
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Old 10-13-2003, 12:12 PM
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Dreams don't have to stay on paper Kid, the ones that are attainable are always worth your hard work. Your writing is getting better. Open your mind's creative box and see what lets itself out, don't try to force originality. And the best advice I can give is what my dear 'ol mom told me when I was just a little *****.

"Lord, grant me the SERENITY to accept the things I cannot change, the COURAGE to change the things that I can, and the WISDOM to know the difference."

Keep it up man, you'll get to where you're going.


MoocH
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Old 10-13-2003, 02:16 PM
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axes wayy too many questions
 

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OK

I was plannning to have Billy look up Stephanie and find out more about her. She will be from someone in the stories past. It's gonna be a shocker.

I understand that I am not making this very realistic but try to understand that I dont know very much about engines and cars, even though I enjoy them.

Billy wont be calling Pete, Peter anymore.

RPM's and tourque will be smaller thanks to you letting me know.

I hope you like it so far.


HRK(Alex)

Chapter 1

Enjoy


HRK(Alex)

Last edited by hot_rod_kid; 10-13-2003 at 02:16 PM.
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Old 10-14-2003, 03:05 PM
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Whers Chapter 3

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Old 10-14-2003, 04:06 PM
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No you need the RPM's higher to pull the wheels off the ground, try maybe 5000-6000. You can also tone the the HP and Torque. You can pull the wheels with 500 HP and less. Squeezing more HP is costly, and might be a little out of reach for the youngin's...you're kinda getting into the strip ranges over 500.

I don't know if you ever rode in a stock '67 GTO pushing a little better than 300HP, but a girlfriend of mine had one and took me for a ride. Whoa! She said for kicks she would take chewing gum and stick a $20 bill on the dash in the middle...told the guys they could keep it if they could grab it while she was accelerating. She might have been BS'n a little, but it sure is hard to move when those babies accelerate! I think she probably scared the mess out of the guys when she got up around 85 in no time flat.

There was another "Vixen" I knew of. The girl was a tall, thin, attractive brunette. I was in a car when my dad ran behind his buddy who was racing her. She had a sleeper '69 Z-28 with a 302 in a partially rusted shell...it didn't look too fast at all. It was one of those white ones with orange stripes...with the rust and all, it looked pretty tacky. I just heard my dad's buddy say, "If you beat me, you can eat me!" Little nubbin' I was, I didn't know what that meant either.

Well dad's buddy in his 350 '68 Camaro was not even a close match, and that guy had a cam and could lift the wheels on his Camaro. They raced on an interstate and dad slowed down far in the shadows when he got to 115...guess he didn't want to be too bad of an influence on me. I never heard of anyone beating her in that Camaro either.

Its good that you're writing, that's real kewl, and you're good at it for your age. Do yourself a favor and ride in these beasts as often as you get a chance to get a real "feel" for the HP and torque.
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Old 10-14-2003, 07:17 PM
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Quote:
you could name the ricer driver 'Lance' and his 'tuner'/mentor 'Chandler'
BstMech,
I think you mean Rick (Kane), not Lance. Haole!
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