I told you so”.
This is a story about a couple that had been happily married for years.
The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.
The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because
it was making her sick
He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a doctor, as she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out.
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner, he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts, then a malicious thought came to her.
She took the bowl, went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep,
gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic
waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his
Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting,
which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic
footsteps as he ran into the bathroom.
The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had gotten him back pretty good.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his
bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit her
lip as she asked him what was the matter.
He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I
didn't listen to you."
"What do you mean?" asked his wife. "Well, you always told me that one
day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened.
But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and these two fingers, I think I
got most of them back in.