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Old 12-28-2005, 10:54 AM
frankenstang57's Avatar
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GM rant...

Sorry guys, I just hafta rant about this one. A friend of mine just bought a '96 Monte Carlo from a salvage auction. He's planning on swapping the 3.4 into his Fiero. Anyway, the car had damage all the way down the driver's side, but most of it in the suspension. During the wreck, the battery got a hole in it and became a very large paperweight. Anyway, we wanted to hear the thing run and check out the overall condition of the drivetrain before parting it out. What the heck were they thinking when the put the #$%^& battery in those cars? The @#$%^ is burried! You can't even get jumper cables on it. I mean, removing the washer tank gets you a look at the top of battery, but what were they thinking when they attached the hold down to the underneath the air box? Man I hate it when manufacturers make it so the average joe can't even do basic maintinance on his car. Just flat out unnecessary in my book. No wonder GM's circling the bowl! Rant mode off...

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Old 01-01-2006, 08:02 PM
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Rant mode back on...

I'm working on a Ford that has blind holes/nuts to hold the rear of the engine cradle up. I had to pull it apart to change a sway bar. I'm thinking every manufacturer does this type of crap just to torment the shadetree wrenchers. The nuts aren't even attached to anything. No welds, no nothing. And, to top it off, the owners want to drive it with the broken left side strut spring. I'm going to avoid that area of town. I told them it's not safe at all, and that they're going to cause a wreck. What do people think somedays?


Rant mode back off....


In a while, Chet.
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Old 01-01-2006, 09:51 PM
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I've never seen under the hood of a Monte Carlo but my mom has a PT Cruiser and the battery is buried in much the same way. You cant see it at all but there is a jumper terminal so you can jump it if needed.

The power steering line on my 88 Prelude snakes its way clear across the engine compartment, around the engine and finally down to the steering rack. I had to cut it into three pieces to get it out. Whats worse is the replacement line isnt routed the same way so it took forever to figure out how to get it back in.
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Old 01-01-2006, 10:18 PM
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That's what happens when cars are designed on computers, and not in garages!
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Old 01-01-2006, 10:36 PM
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I had/have again an ex-gov (GSA) '76 Torino wagon, 351M C-6. The oil pan has a side drain plug and through major choking on the engineer's parts, there is a cross brace horizontally placed directly in the used oils' path of departure! It hits the brace and sprays all over creation! But that's just messy.. The worst I can remember lately is trying to replace the remote oil filter supply/return line on my wife's '93 Jimmy (W code 200hp 4.3 Vortec, a real pocket rocket). Once you find the engine block end and unbolt the adapter bolt, you discover that an engine/trans brace goes THROUGH the MIDDLE of the ONE piece hose assembly! This requires you to completely remove the brace. One end is easy, the other.. ...it took 2 hours on a lift at the base auto hobby shop to figure out a way to get to that one bolt. The same brace on the other side was easily accessed and seen at both ends! Of course, I still had to get the old part out and the new one in... I was SO glad I didn't start that job at home...

A former coworker had a front drive Grand Prix in the early '90s and it cost him $500+ for an alternator. When I was finally able to close my mouth and ask WHY? He said the dealership basically had to disassemble the front of the car to be able to reach the mounting bolts Give me "old" tech that's repairable over "hi-tech" that you toss when it breaks any day! Give me messy over impossible to reach anytime!

Stu
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Old 01-01-2006, 10:42 PM
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You got a leaky spark tube...
 
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I remember when the Chevy Trailblazer first came out with the 4.2L I6 one of the things Motor Trend or C&D or whoever it was commented on the hole cast into the oil pan to allow the front axle to pass through on 4x4 models....
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Old 01-01-2006, 10:58 PM
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I saw an episode of Orange County Choppers where Paul Jr. and Vinnie were putting a nitrous system in a new Prowler. They had to get to the battery in that thing and it was buried behind the drivers side fender....which had to be partially pulled apart. At least it was accessible, if you knew where to find it!
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Old 01-02-2006, 12:29 AM
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A Toyota rant (why not eh?)

I had a 1982 Toyota Starlet, you had to take the steering apart to replace the damn starter & then hope you got it lined back up right the 1st time
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Old 01-02-2006, 01:25 AM
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Not just GM, we have an Audi TDI here and it will need a new timing belt soon.
To change it the whole front must be moved forward, that is everything in front of the timing belt. It all has to go forward on special long bolts and then the engine has to be "locked" so the crank cannot be moved and get out of phase with the valves and fuel pump.
The battery sits in the engine compartment against the firewall in a plenum, this gets water off the windscreen, but has holes in the bottom to let the water run out. Fine in theory but they installed some kind of wierd grommet in the holes which gets clogged with dust and dirt, you find out when it overflows onto your feet inside the car. Rover had the same set up alooong time ago, the warning on those came when the pedal assembly rotted off.

Last edited by malc; 01-02-2006 at 01:31 AM.
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Old 01-02-2006, 05:45 AM
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Most engineers suffer from rectum/cranyitus and they haven't gotten thier glass belly button award yet so they haven't got a clue.

Last edited by 56 Project; 01-02-2006 at 08:22 AM.
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Old 01-02-2006, 06:06 AM
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Havn't you guys gotten it yet............??

You are not supposed to work on you own cars.............They are supposed to go back to the dealer for work. Then they can charge extra for all those other parts that they have to remove. And, they can say...."By the way, you need this and that, and that will be a few hundred more......Have a nice day"
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Old 01-02-2006, 06:26 AM
Will I ever get it done?
 

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Come on guys, let's step out of our little hot rod world and look at the big picture. Car companies exist to make money. If they are going to make money, they have to provide cars that people want at the lowest cost. Average Joe American probably doesn't even have "battery location" or "ability to jump start" on their radar screen. It's a new car! They intend to sell it before they need to worry about that. The vast majority of new car buyers want things like AC that freezes them out, fit and finish, a five star rating they can brag to their friends about, fuel economy, and looks. If getting swoopy lines and good fuel economy while making maximum profit means taking a fender off to change the battery, what would you choose (remember, it is your job to make money for the company, that is why they pay you).

As an aside, it has been my experience that most people with rectum/cranyitus use the word "all" when they mean "some" or "most".

Bob - Mechanical Engineer
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Old 01-02-2006, 08:22 AM
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Are you guys forgetting about things like Mandated fuel milage and Crash standards? These are not the fault of manufactures. New car form follows law not function. Cars are built to make them conform to Federal law. All this happy horse s=== we find in the late model cars is a best effort to make the cars comply and still be salable. Oh yeah , corporate heirarchy dont have a clue what looks and performs good, just what soccermom says she likes
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Old 01-02-2006, 08:27 AM
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The engineers design it and the techs have to make it work. The more they improve them the more we have to protect them from themselves.
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