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Old 02-25-2005, 08:07 PM
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I'm A Daddy Again!

Up until now I have kept this personal information to the moderators, and only four other general members of this site.
Well now is the time to share some good news for a change, but first. . .

My wife and I got married almost 7 years ago, I have been a stepdad to "our" son Troy from her first marriage since he was 9 months old. Her AND her ex admit their marriage was a big mistake, we get along as needed.

My daughter Sarah was born almost a year after we were married, and we had tried almost a year after she was born to have another, but were met head-on with a miscarriage.

Almost a year and a half after that we were unfortunate and suffered a loss of another miscarriage, and did some careful forethought into trying again- which we eventually did.

Last year on February 28th my wife delivered our daughter Allison as a stillborn, a result of overactivity in which she had twisted her umbilical cord enough to constrict the lifegiving flow of nutrients she needed to enter our world. Honestly, the hardest thing I ever had to do was to arrange for the funeral of my daughter, and I hope to never go through that again.
I dedicated my 1000th post here on Hotrodders.com in the moderators forum to her, and that is when they found out everything I am typing here.
We rethought the reasoning behind our wanting to have another child, and decided to give fate a chance to deal whatever came to us one last time.

This morning February 25, 2005 at 8:26am, I welcomed my son into this world.
Andrew was born via C-section, and he weighed a healthy 9 pounds even and measured 22 inches.

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Old 02-25-2005, 08:14 PM
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Congrats man!!And the Mrs. too. That baby looks very healthy, so the best of luck in keeping him supplied in hotrods.

BTW, miscarriages really suck, my wife and I miscarried back in late Dec 2002. I wouldn't wish that pain off on my worst enemy. The only thing worse would be losing one later in life. Now take your son and give him the world and all the love you can. Precious as life is, NEVER take it for granted.
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Old 02-25-2005, 08:14 PM
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Congratulations!!

I am sorry to hear about all the trouble. That is real hard. My wife and I went through one miscarriage before having our son Holden. Still born is just something I pray I never have to endure. I feel for you, but I think that you will find it easier with your new son now.

Congrats again.

Chris
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Old 02-25-2005, 08:24 PM
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I treat my "step"SON Troy just as if he were my own, he already has his own very large Mac tools toolbox with a lock on it so good ol' dad won't "borrow" any of his tools.

I won't treat either of my boys differently because of any situation.

I also agree I wouldn't wish anything like what we went through in the past 5 years on anyone for anything in the world.

I admit losing all composure when we lost Allison, I cried a lot, and my daughter Sarah tried all she could to "help" me. Having her and Troy there to enjoy the company of made a difference.

We all visit the grave as often as possible, and I still need to get the final permission from the cemetery to put my own headstone on her grave.
Debbie and I have layed out a design for me to sandblast my own, but until we get the final say from the cemetery we have nothing else to do but wait and place flowers or other small things.

Last edited by M&M CUSTOM; 02-25-2005 at 08:25 PM. Reason: Spelling
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Old 02-25-2005, 08:29 PM
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And a mighty fine son you have!! Congratulations to you and the little lady, happy everything turned out ok this time. Isn't he just as cute as a button. Good job. now the fun begins.
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Old 02-25-2005, 09:00 PM
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Yeeeee-haaaaa!!!!!

Awesome Matt. Excellent news.

I have had this on my mind lately. Been under stress and deadlines with the server move, etc. And trying to coordinate a million things at once, and dealing with issues I couldn't even explain if I tried.

And working towards this date, today, to get the board up on the new server -- the 25th.

And every time I got stressed against that deadline, I just said to myself: "You think this is tough? M&M CUSTOM is counting down to a date when they're going to cut open his wife and pull out his son. That's tough!"

I don't have kids, but man, what a load to carry on your mind. Life and death and love and your wife and your child all mixed up in one super-important moment. It's given me strength just to think about someone dealing with it.

You must feel incredibly, amazingly relieved right now. And proud, and thrilled, and every great feeling in the world handed to you. And you and your wife deserve this. You've suffered for it more than anyone should ever have to.

And, I think getting rid of some projects and buying your wife a minivan is a really strong move that sets a great example for hotrodders about real priorities. That minivan is going to be the Ever-Lovin' Man-Card Minivan Machine!

Congrats to you and your wife and your new son and your family!
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Old 02-25-2005, 09:06 PM
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Congratulations,that is a fine looking young man you have there.
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Old 02-25-2005, 09:14 PM
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Congradulations,I have three 14,11,9.Carl
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Old 02-25-2005, 09:28 PM
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Congrats m&M and wife. I know how you feel, I have never experienced a still birth, but I lost a 35 year old son a few years back which was very difficult to deal with. You just have to trust and praise God for the gift of a son.

Al
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Old 02-25-2005, 09:52 PM
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Congrats M&M and Mrs. M&M and the little M&M
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Old 02-26-2005, 02:43 AM
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Congratulations and god bless you and your family
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Old 02-26-2005, 07:31 AM
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Like stated in a previous post, yes, I am relieving the shop of two of "my" project vehicles, and I did buy the wife a Dodge Grand Caravan that I had her pick out. This is to replace the last van she picked out on mothers day 5 years ago, which has nickel and dimed my last straw.

I was in the operating room for nearly all of the Ceserean, holding her hand and by some stroke of luck was able to see a reflection in a glass door from a cabinet that was left open, I was able to see almost exactly what she has been diligently watching on the Discovery channel for months now, only in real life and real time, to the woman I married.

I was able to see when his little head was presented, when he was pulled the rest of the way out, and when the doctor held him up and cut the umbilical cord (they usually don't let the dad cut the cord if baby is born C-section, I had asked earlier), and while all this was happening I was telling her what was going on as she had elected for a "spinal" and awake for the whole procedure, we both cried, I wiped her tears until the nurse asked if I wanted to go with Andy to the nursery, which is where I ended up doing a little waterworks of my own. Debbie had to remain in the O/R for another procedure, she elected to have a Tubal Ligation, because we feel we have enough kids now and going through what we have is more than enough.

The last week has been tough on myself, mainly because of the everlooming thought of "what would my life be like if she passed away on the day the little guy was born?", that exact thought remained until the moment they wheeled Debbie out of recovery and toward her room for the weekend.

Another thing that happened to cross my mind was the fact my father was going to be in the same operating room that afternoon, but for a small routine procedure (he was brought to the hospital late and ended up getting through the surgery earlier than the doctor had expected, his recovery was also quicker than they had expected and he was able to leave earlier than they originally planned).

He was able to see his only grandson and his name carried on for another generation. We have been through a LOT with him for the past three years also, and we all attribute his current status to his bound and determined stubborn-ness, and he is doing great considering what he has been through.
He says he has lived his life, and is catching up on his lost rest time.
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Old 02-26-2005, 08:57 AM
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Congrats, M&M, kids are the greatest gift the good Lord can bless anyone with. Dan
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Old 02-26-2005, 09:12 AM
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Enjoy, he's a hansome little rascal.
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Old 02-26-2005, 09:27 AM
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WOW!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!

I know it was a long hard wait for you but it looks like it was worth the wait to bring a young man like that into this world! Supreme job, and hey man, I'm glad for you to have a BABY BOY!!!(Them girls can be rough on a fellar! ) A bunch of M&Ms running around, and remember, they melt in your arms, not your hands.
-Ciao!
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