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Men, the birth process, and misconceptions

2K views 24 replies 14 participants last post by  Moby302 
#1 · (Edited)
Men, birth, and misconceptions (Edited and complete))

I know that I am not always the brightest bulb in the hallway, but today I had a misconception straightened out for me about child birth. I am a father of two, so I do have a concept of the process. My lovely bride had our daughter first. She broke water at 6 AM and we held our bundle of joy at approx 11 AM. My son was about the same. Broke water in K-mart near the hospital at 2 PM and had dinner with the grandparents at 7 PM to celebrate the new son and heir to the K fortune.
(sorry for the time laps, my box at work blew up!)

I found out yesterday that labor can last for 17,...24,...and even 48 hrs?
I know I want a epidermal. my wife went from a cursing sailor to a loving nurturing lady in 5.7 seconds.
 
#4 ·
Are you drinkin again, or is this one of those gotta think about it kind of things? I'm sure as usual it's quite witty, but us ignorant people need a picture sometimes. :embarrass :D
 
#10 ·
I told him not to stick just his head into the wormhole but would he listen to me...nooooooo.

It'll make ya all discombobulated like.

Cheap buzz though!:)
 
#11 ·
LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just read this and edited the post. had a computer malfunction at work and it posted when I wasn't finished. The answers are just too funny. Willys, I'm saving yours. I have NO earthly idea what you said, but I'm going to memorize it and use it in a meeting someday!
 
#13 ·
Ok, Now since I know what your talking about:D
The day our oldest was born my wife woke me about 1:30AM to tell me she thought she was going into labor I was very nice about it and told her don't worry about it just go back to sleep. That went over like a lead balloon. Well about 7:00am I said well I guess it is about time to head to the hospital. Called the boss told him I wouldn't be in today, going to have a baby instead. Went to the hospital and finally had our baby girl about 8:20PM!!
And she was worried she wouldn't make it to the hospital in time. At the time I was an EMT and knew the first one always takes along time.;)
 
#14 ·
ok .. so thats where all this is leading!!!
I went into labour at approx 2 in the afternoon June 19th 1992
Hubby is not a "hospital kinda guy " he sees the word and faints! Anyway they took me by ambulance .. I was 10 weeks early and was far from being prepared to have my baby!
Hubby met me at the hospital but somehow beat the ambulance.. He till this day has no idea of how he did it because he swears he followed us! (Yea right .. he follows no one!) Anyway after hours of complications the drs decided that the babys head was turned and instead of trying to deliver with the chance of his neck snapping they gave me an epidural .. it relaxed him and myself ............... 4 mins in the delivery room and Voila! 4 pounds 3 ounces... 12:03 am June 20th ! My son was born ... he didnt cry ... i was sooo worried.. he was so tiny he almost fit in the palm of hands.. put side by side. Hubby of course missed it all because he was passed out in the hallway .. One hour later wondering what was going on .. and of course they dont tell you a thing .. a nurse came out and said both dad and baby are doing fine! Hubby needed stitches on his elbow.. i guess he split it hitting the floor , he had a good size bump on his noggin but no worse for the wear!


We only had the one.. Doctors said to leave it on a good note!
now our little bundle of joy is wrenching along side of mom and using the D A along side of dad.. Yep .. future rodder in the works.. Kinda makes ya proud!


pup
 
#15 ·
I was OK when i went into the delivery room. I kept my face 9 inches from hers asnd never looked down except for once. When I did that, I saw the DR. with the biggest set of chrome salad tongs I'd even seen and he and the tongs went someplace only I had been with a LOT smaller tool!
 
#17 ·
Mine was born to this world 4 yrs ago and the misses had her "C" section and I saw parts of the ol lady she has never seen!It was truly the happiest day of my life.The nurse took pictures of the whole thing and some are pretty hardcore,kinda too much for the weak stomached people but they are of the first breaths my little sweety took in this world.The person that invented the epadurel needs some kind of award because it makes "all the world good" as said by a friend who had her first last week.And my wife is 9 weeks pregnated...........yes I know what causes that.......we still havent told the inlaws we might wait till Christmas.....and my back burner gets even more place upon it(lol)but I think I'll manage somehow:pimp: :thumbup:
 
#18 ·
Congrat MadRabbit. to you and your wife.

Going back about 21 odd years, I was 35 hours in labour with my first son, eventually emergency caesar, 2 weeks overdue with #2 so another caesar, and after that #'s 3, 4 and 5 were all caesars.
Much nicer way to have kids in my reckoning, but then I did not really have an option, LOL. When #5 was born the nurse came thru to me and asked me if I was ready to feed him, I said sure, as soon as she brings the bottle thru, she started to give me the whole breastfeeding is better thing and I gave her one filthy look,
told her this was my fifth child and would she please bring his bottle, she avoided me for the rest of my stay. :D
If I did'nt scare the hell out of them my kids sure did, my family descending on a hospital is enough to scare most folks out of ever having kids. And now I have a grandson due in December.:thumbup:
 
#19 ·
Heres a pic of my gang.
 

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#20 ·
I wonder how you find time to wrench on all those Fords you have there Moby(lol)I asked the Dr. if we could install a zipper on the misses and they threw me out of the room,I guess they werent in a joking mood!But it looks like this one will be C section as well.My wife was a wild one back in the day, her brother told her to jump off the house(2 story with an exposed basement)onto the trampoline in the back yard and she flew about 25-30ft in the air and landed about 20ft from the trampoline and had hip surgery with allot of pins and stuff .She was 13ish and her pelvic bone didnt shape right when it healed so all of our children will more than likely be C sections.At least I know what to expect now that I've been through it before, I hope!;)
 
#21 ·
And you now know that you can have at least five kids by c-section with only minor hassles :pain: :D :D
 
#22 ·
Our first went 36 hours then had to be a c-section. First baby of the new year 1982. We were on t.v. and everything. Our last was also a c-section was an April Fool's baby. Dr. held her up to the operating window and said another boy (we had 3 boys). Was a little dissapointed but then saw it was missing thee important boy parts. Made the wife very happy seeing how we quit having kids after the 3rd boy. She was mad at me for a month when she knew she was pregnant for that one. Was in Canada at the time. She was one of thes women who knew almost the moment she got pregnant. Freaky!
 
#23 ·
Our daughter was a C-Section baby. When my boy was born he weighed 7lbs and the way my wifes pelvic bone is shape had came out with a broken collar bone. That was 11 years ago.
When my wife was pregnant with our daughter, the doc looked at her and said there is NO WAY that she was going to be born through Natural birth...C-section it was. I sat in some little room watching from the outside in...queesy! About 20-30 minutes later I was holding an 11lb girl!
Later,
WEIMER
 
#25 ·
Thats harsh, hope it all works out for her.
I refuse to sign for blood transfusions, specially in this country, I will rather take the 'fake' blood, plasmalyte, or something like that.
 
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