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  #91 (permalink)  
Old 05-27-2012, 01:28 PM
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"You Tolkien to me?!"

~ Hobbit De Niro


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  #92 (permalink)  
Old 05-27-2012, 02:24 PM
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one full turn after it squeeks
 
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"Let me have a Three Musketeers, and a ball point pen, and one of those combs there, a pint of Old Harper, a couple of flash light batteries and some beef jerky." Terry Fields aka Toad
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  #93 (permalink)  
Old 05-31-2012, 02:26 AM
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Many people use the money they don't have to buy the things they don't need to impress the people they don't like.
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  #94 (permalink)  
Old 05-31-2012, 07:57 AM
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I heard this one yesterday, it's an oldie: We don't have a single fly in here, they are all married and have large families.
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"When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not." - Mark Twain
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  #95 (permalink)  
Old 06-04-2012, 06:22 PM
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one full turn after it squeeks
 
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Here's one my Dad used to say: "Hotter'n a pot'a Collards!"
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  #96 (permalink)  
Old 06-30-2012, 08:23 AM
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The only way to solve the traffic problems of the country is to pass a law that only paid-for cars are allowed to use the highways. That would make traffic so scarce, we could use our boulevards for children's playgrounds.
- Will Rogers, 1879 - 1935

LOLOLOL, he had no idea how nuts this would become!
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  #97 (permalink)  
Old 06-30-2012, 06:25 PM
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My all time favorite and I use it frequently in retort to complaints or just about whenever I fell like it is from Little Mike Marlow.
"Don't rush the monkey and you'll see a better show!"
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  #98 (permalink)  
Old 06-30-2012, 11:27 PM
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"GROWING old was GREAT! BEING old SUCKS!!"

"As you grow older:
(1) Never get too far from a restroom.
(2) Never pass up a chance to look at a pretty girl.
(3) Never trust a fart"

Tom
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  #99 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 06:07 AM
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If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone elses, we'd grab ours back.
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  #100 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 06:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Job~Rated View Post
If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone elses, we'd grab ours back.
"profound" - - - and oh so true

P.S. how's the gigs goin' ??
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  #101 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 07:25 AM
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It's a sad tale, I'm afraid. But a happy one, too!

We'd just finished a gig & the keyboard player accused the drummer of trying to rip us off & before I knew it, it'd all blown out of proportion & the keyboard player stormed off.

Once the dust had settled, the drummer & guitarist remained buddies & I remained loyal to my friend of 30 years & keys man, Mark & we've decided to go ahead with a booking we have in September by getting a different (better) guitarist & drummer.

Looking back on it all, I can honestly say that fun as it was, it's all worked out for the best. I was having trouble with the drummers poor sense of timing & the schizophrenic guitar player.

Don't fret 'cos I'll post links to videos as & when.
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  #102 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 07:37 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Job~Rated View Post
it's all worked out for the best. I was having trouble with the drummers poor sense of timing & the schizophrenic guitar player.
Been there Did you hear the one about the Band Bus that ran off of a cliff and killed "all the musicians" and the drummer?
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  #103 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 08:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wretched ratchet View Post
Been there Did you hear the one about the Band Bus that ran off of a cliff and killed "all the musicians" and the drummer?
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  #104 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 09:36 AM
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Those are my principles, and if you don't like them...well, I have others.
-- Groucho Marx
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  #105 (permalink)  
Old 07-18-2012, 09:46 AM
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I always get the blame around here! Who threw a cane at the TV? Who fell into the china hutch? Who got their dentures stuck on the toilet?

-- Grampa Simpson

This pretty much explains a lot of things!
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