Don't forget about gudgeon pins (wrist pins) and gaiters (rubber shock covers). I was a Triumph motorcycle owner for many years.

I walked into a parts store and the two guys behind the counter were laughing pretty hard so I had to ask what was so funny. They told me a guy just called in and was obviously a *********, said his car wasn't running right and he thinks he needs a new crankshaft. The caller went on and asked how hard they are to put on. The guy at the part store told him there was nothing to it; bolts right on, you can have it done in less than an hour.

Way Back In The Old Timey Days "about 1967" Or So I Witnessed To Guys Become Extremely Angry When The Parts Guy Behind The Counter Would Not Sell Them A Replacement "passing Gear" For A Lemans. There Car Would Not Downshift & Someone Suckered Them Into Running Down To The Parts Store & Pick One Up So They Could Slip It On For Them

There was this kid that used to come hang out at night when I had the garage open (I always work with the garage open, unless its temporarily a spraybooth). This kid would always ask a few stupid questions. Such as (looking at my inline 20R 4 banger) "Is that a 350?" 'No, its a stock 4 banger...' "Yeah, thats what I thought."

So he gets onto his stories. Hes got a mid 80s Camaro or Firebird, don't know which, thats got 500 horse, and does 10s. Seems like everyone knows a guy with one of those.

He tells me about his friend he hangs out with all the time, whos totally rich, and has a Vette and a Ferarri, but drives a lifted '86 Bronco on 44s with 4 wheel steering and a blown big block Mopar that gets 3 MPG but has 3000 horse as a daily drive, just because he can afford the gas. I asked if he filled up at the airport? *puzzled look* "No, at the gas station."

His uncles friend, has a 65 GTO with a tube chassis and a blown big block, that runs flat 6s, and drives on the street. It has a tube chassis because the stock frame bent, and one of the front wheels wouldnt touch the ground.

He had a lot more stories, those just stuck out. Kid was hard to make leave. I worked with the garage closed for a few weeks, and never saw him again.




As for the VW with a Porsche motor, that reminds me of something. A true story, with a liar behind it.

So I'm taking soem Automotive and machining classes at the local JC. Last week I was leaving class, and saw a Porsche in one of the bays with the door open. The hood was popped, and I looked, and saw some chrome stuff, cool deal. But I had to look twice. I saw two valve covers, positioned like a V8. So I go in to take a closer look. Theres a 5.0 with trick flow intake (maybe heads too, they looked aluminum) stuffed in the back of this Porsche. I said now thats damn cool. A guy behind me, apparently the owner, sitting there in a suit says to me "Yeah, 4 years of hard work, and $50,000 in parts, it better be cool."

I still wouldn't mind driving it.

I worked at a youth detention center for a short time. I got to hear a lot of BS stories on a regular basis. The kids rarely gave any thought to things they repeat. If they heard it it must be true. One day I'm getting ready to take the group to chow and one of the kids pop up with "You know if you spit off the Empire State Building and it hits someone they will die." I looked at him for a moment and said "How come you don't die when it rains?" He never did figure it out.

That made me lol....

When I was in high school (just a FEW years ago) a couple guys I knew decided that they needed to prove who's cars was faster; the '73 camaro with a well tuned 350 or the not runnin quite right big block chevelle. Well my buddy with the camaro smokes the chevelle. So the kid with the chevelle asks him how he could get his camaro to go so fast. With a straight face he tells him he just waxed the car with "fast wax" and it could be purchased at the local NAPA store. The guys at NAPA laughed about that one for years!!!
Thanks for the memory, hadn't thought of that one in years
Skip

Variations of that story have been around since I was a kid (many,many years ago!!) No one can ever tell you just where to find that guy with the fast car though!!

Thats funny I dont care who you are
Shane

Well actually a Jetta will do 140mph. Even the diesel will top 140mph nowadays. And VW do a 1.4 liter Turbo/Blower combo 170hp four that will go over 140mph.

Actually, the Jetta won't top 140MPH because it can't. It has a limiter to keep it under 130MPH.

Das link: http://myautoworld.com/autos/vw/vw-...w-jetta-06.html

Oh. Here in Germany the limiters are 155mph, so most Golfs/Jettas don't need limiting except R32s and the like. Sorry we spoil the cars before shipping them to you, but that's what Joe public wants stateside: - automatic transmissions and soft suspensions - puke!
Ed

"When I was a kid,(long time ago) this dufus tells me about this "Uncle" of his, had hot rods, girl friends, etc. You know the drill, one day he says his uncle has this acid that will dissolve anything but a diamond. I asked him what he kept it in."

That story reminds me of one a friend's dad told us. This was back in late 50's 60's that it happened. He was in a service station when a oil treatment rep comes in trying to sell a new oil treatment for engines. The rep goes on and on about how well the oil treatment works because it "soaks" into the metal of the engine block.

So my friend's dad says the old man that ran the place looks at the rep with a straight face and says "How the F**K you keep that S**T in the can then?"

When I was a kid a buddy of mine was convinced that his older brother in the Marines could singlehandedly pick himself up off the ground 6" by his shirt collar and hold himself out at arm's length for 5 minuites! I know that's not a car story, but when he got out of the Marines he bought a red 58 Plymouth with pom poms in the windows, like Christine. Never did see him perform any feats of strength, except a failed attempt at knocking out a horse. He severely broke his hand, bones sticking out.

Back in the mid 70s I used to ride motorcycles with a Air Force guy from Kentucky who claimed to have an 11 or 10 sec 64 Galaxy street car back home with a 390 in it. I'm a Ford guy and I found that highly unlikely. He was driving a Ford Fiesta that you would have thought was a Porche 911.
I remember a guy in auto shop with a Rambler that had a "blower" in it. Turned out to be the a/c unit.
Of course my first car was a red 66 Mustang cp with a 3 spd stick and 2 barrel 380 hp 289 stealth Cobra enginemotor that was a special experimental HiPo that Shelby built in ,63