[Canadian Charlie]

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, splattering it against that freshly painted part you were drying.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench at the speed of light. Also removes fingerprint whorls and hard-earned guitar calluses in about the time it takes you to say, "Ouch...."

Full text: http://www.diybanter.com/showthread.php?t=123707

[lowROLLERchevy]

also add:

Sawzall: a tool thats supposedly used fro cutting material. but more often then not its used to re-injur the wrist you sprained last week while tripping over your extension cord, can also be used for managing to punch yourself in the chest while under the car

Lathe: first tool used to take an oversized bolt and turn it into an undersized bolt

Tap & Die set: Tap, see drill bit reference in the EZ OUT section. Die: 2nd step used on the bolt mentioned in the lathe definition, DAMMIT TOOL is step 3, after retuning to the car to realize you made the bolt 1 size to small

[papawswrench]

All true descriptions ! I sent that to some friends that can relate to them .

[FrankR]

When I was younger, I read this in an old Cartoons magazine complete with drawings. I never did understand what Whitworth sockets were until I actually came across some on a Peugeot moped. It really stumped the guy at the hardware store when we could not find a nut for something on it.

[papawswrench]

The thread pitch is different , I used to keep a box of them around the bike shop , because the Triumphs and BSAs were always losing them or the owners were abusing them till they were trashed ! Every British screw or nut I found went in that box .

[bigbadbowtie]

Thats funny and SO VERY TRUE!!!

[KULTULZ]

Lets' not forget the ever popular;

• LEFT-HANDED MONKEY WRENCH
  
  ..and the frequently requested
  
  
• WEST VIRGINIA RATCHET