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Old 06-21-2007, 01:55 AM
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Doc here,

I've never, Ever, had a problem with grease all my years..

And the remedy is soooo simple..

Simply pay the guy at jiffy Boob $20 Fazools to do it for you...

By the time you blow up 2 or 3 "Well Engineered" grease guns,...

4 or 5 tubes of gloppy~Arsed grease dripping all down your sleeve and shirt, filling your breast pocket..(making your non~Filter camels smoke like they need a ring job..)

Snapping off a few Zerk Fittings, trying to "Hold the day~um gun" , Pump the Day~um thing..and hold the Day~um Greasy hose tightly on the Day~um zerk fitting..(The instructions NEVER told you: You are Required to grow a third Arm/hand For this operation) ...

Reinventing the wheel to try and get the now busted Zerk fittings Out of what was previously a well greased pivot point..

Finding out that Grease Really Smokes a long time on hot headers..and seems to live forever under intense heat..and smells like a BBQ at a wrecking yard..

Using 196 Red shop rags for 12 zerk fittings..that seem to leak like a sieve..

Finding that a greased Drive belt is NOT necessarily a good thing for continuous operation..

Two hours in the shower...

One point Five hours Cleaning the ring out of the tub, and sink bowl..

two hours washing the towels and wash cloths (along with your shirt..Two More bottles of shout..)

Four hours in the Laundromat..

Two bottles of shout applied to the shirt..

One New pack of Camels...

30 minutes of cleaning it off your shoe sole..(after you tracked it across the white carpet to the bathroom and kitchen to get another brewski..)

2 Bottles of Resolve Carpet cleaner..

Rental of Steam cleaner Before the main squeeze gets home...(and REALLY gives you a grease job..)

Watching Fido, cover his ears and eyes with his paws, in total disdain, knowing full well, If you don't clean this disaster up before the Female of the Species returns'll be sharing the "Bunk house tonight" in the backyard together again..

Watching the Young Tech at Jiffy Boob inflict all this self abuse upon himself for $8 Fazools an hour..PRICELESS!!!

That $20 Fazools don't look so awfully bad now...

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